Dear Touchdown Jesus,
Could you please give our Fighting Irish of Notre Dame the strength to beat the crap out of USC tomorrow? There's a possible shot at a national championship on the line here. You heard me correctly.
The Irish have a chance to play for a championship if they win this game.
Think of how many heathens could be converted back to Catholicism just by watching the Irish beat USC, and then possibly Ohio State. People back winners, Touchdown Jesus. If the Irish don't win it all, then those damn Scientologist Trojans will continue their quest for worldwide dominance.We don't know why you let Reggie Bush push Matt Leinart (who has a child out of wedlock!!) into the end zone last year, Touchdown Jesus. We forgive you, though. Just please make it up to us this year.
So please, Touchdown Jesus, give us your help.
Guide Brady's passes into the arms of Jeff Samardzija and Rhema McKnight.
Spread holes in the Trojan defense for Darius Walker to run through.
Give Tom Zbikowski some support and help the rest of this defense stop somebody.
Please, Touchdown Jesus. If you don't help us, then the terrorists win.
Sincerely,
Foul Balls
Technorati Tags: College Football, Notre Dame, Jesus, Xenu
9 comments:
Let me help...
Hail Mary, full of grace...
Ah, fuck it. Go Irish.
funniest post of the week. unless, of course, you were serious, in which case saddest post of the week.
meanwhile, just caught a usc pregame show on espn radio here in lala land. usc fans/experts can barely contain themselves, so certain are they of winning tomorrow. if only pete carroll and squad were as arrogant.
Well fuck you Touchdown Jesus!!!
i think you pissed off gangsta jesus.
USC, the best college team money can buy...yeah, panger, I'm bitter.
But Dwayne Jarrett is pretty good.
trust me, i hate 'em too. and they're INSUFFERABLE today.
(although when discussing the "best money can buy" that's the pot callin the kettle black...)
If Notre Dame paid it's athletes we'd have somebody in the secondary who can run a faster 40 than me.
Yeah, ND doens't recruit the black athlete, so says the Golden Boy Paul Hornung.
Hell, Michael Irvin might go so far as to say all ND's black athletes long lost relatives were sneaking into their masters bedrooms and thats what makes them slower, that little bit a vanilla in the blood.
By the way, Irvin is a moron, and that was a lame attempt at a bad joke. Wanna help me out here, Tom?
If your great great great great grandma had slipped into the barn of Dave Chappelles great great great great Grandpappy, that woulda been funny.
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