Women of the World Prepare to Say Goodbye to their Husbands and Boyfriends

Today marks the release of Madden 07 and instead of wondering how long until cover boy Shaun Alexander succumbs to the Madden jinx, there's a completely different question on my mind:

Why the hell don't I care?

This will mark the first year in the last fifteen that I will not be buying the new version of Madden. Nothing against Madden, as this year's version looks awesome.

The release of the newest version of the game has always been one of those days that I'd mark on my calendar and await expectantly, like Lindsay Lohan pining for her next eight ball. This year, though, I wasn't even aware of the game's impending release until late last week. I felt that familiar urge to buy it but after giving it some thought realized it would just be an empty gesture.

I bought this year's version of NCAA Football 07, and though I played the hell out of it for the first few days, it kinda got shelved. I haven't even finished my freshman season as a middle linebacker for Notre Dame yet and I've totally fallen behind studying for my mid-term. With this type of burden already on my shoulders, how could I undertake leading the Bears to Super Bowl XLI?

My biggest concern is, what has happened to my desire to play video games?

Is there something wrong with me?

Am I finally starting to grow up?

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!?

I feel like a recovering heroin addict. Any second now I may relapse and run to Best Buy to pick the game up or order it on Amazon and pay for overnight delivery.

I keep telling myself I have a bunch of sick days at work I haven't burned yet and now would be the perfect time. Who needs a job when you can make Rex Grossman play like an actual NFL quarterback? Isn't that all the reward a man should need in life? Is that not ultimate fulfillment?

I've reached a crossroads in my life, and there's no telling how or who I'll be when I come out on the other side. I'm scared, world....so very scared. I'm also cold, and there are wolves after me.