Feel That Bass

Mexican Riot Cop Owned By Drum - Watch more free videos

I don't pay any damn attention to soccer, so I have no idea why this fan is so angry, but I'm incredibly happy that he is. Now, I don't condone violence against the police, be they American or Mexican, but I don't not condone violence against the police when it's this entertaining.

(Via With Leather)

David Beckham And Snoop Are Boys

Start with the fact that there isn't anything going on in Chicago sports right now that I feel like talking about (I did think about writing about Donovan McNabb, but I got about 9 more months of not being that excited by the story to write about it). Add to it the fact I'm already sick of the Mitchell Report and all the steroid talk, and then throw in the fact I have to work earlier today than usual, and I just don't have anything I feel is worth writing about today.

Sorry, but them's the breaks, kid.

So instead of leaving you here wondering what the hell is going on, I'll just post this video of David Beckham and Snoop Dogg chillin.

Diving In Soccer Has Gotten Ridiculous

What you've just seen is AC Milan's goalkeeper Dida being attacked by a fan after giving up a goal to Celtic in a soccer match yesterday.

I don't know if the fan had something in his hand as he attacked Dida, but um, okay dude. Listen, the refs can't red card the guy because he's not a player, so there's no need to chase after him for a second and then drop to the ground.

Who in the hell needs to be taken off on a stretcher after getting punched in the face?

(Via With Leather)

Germany Has Its Priorities Straight

Can you imagine tailgating at Soldier Field before a Bears game, and having tragedy strike? What would happen if you and your friends ran out of beer? What if everybody around you was out of beer?

How on Earth are you going to get drunk before the game starts!? Everybody knows that the Bears aren't going to be able to overcome the mighty Detroit Lions if your punk ass is sitting in your seat stone cold sober. That's just not how football works.

Apparently the European bastardized version of football works the exact same way. In Germany a group of Bayer Leverkusen fans were taking a train to their teams next game in the German Cup when they were faced with such a dilemma.

Thankfully, in Germany, they know how to save the day.

Germany's national railway wasn't about to risk sending a trainload of soccer fans to a German Cup match without beer.

Federal police said Monday that the beer tap failed aboard a special train carrying Bayer Leverkusen fans to Hamburg on Saturday. The fault was discovered half an hour into the journey.

"In order not to endanger the good mood'' of the passengers, railway officials halted the train in Wuppertal for 25 minutes and had a replacement part delivered by taxi, a police statement said. It added that there was no trouble among the fans.

See, now that is protecting and serving your community right there.

Of course, Bayer Leverkusen would go on to lose their match 1-0 to St. Pauli but it didn't matter because everyone was too drunk to care.

Because Soccer Is Just Awesome!

Ok, so I don't think soccer is awesome, but that goal was. The best part of the whole thing? Paul Robinson, the goalie for Tottenham who scored (but you already knew that!) and Ben Foster, the goalie who got scored on, are both competing to be the goalie on England's national team.

Edge Robinson.

Deux Ex Machina

Even God thinks soccer is boring.



with thanks to deadspin

Jesus is My Goalie

In Europe, soccer is religion. That's not good news if you're the Vatican. So what's a religion like Catholicism to do? How can they get the people to turn back to Christ?

Don't worry, the Vatican has the answer. They know what must be done.

They'll start their own soccer club!

Cardinal Tarcisio Bertone, the Pope's No2 and an avid football fan, said: "I don't exclude the possibility that the Vatican could field a football team at the level of the most famous professional clubs."

Bertone insists the huge number of Brazilian religious students at the Vatican could be drafted in to create a divine side, which would play in yellow and white.

There are a few problems, though.

First, where would the team play? Vatican City isn't exactly a large place. In fact it's about the size of five football pitches. (Pitch is what they call a field in Europe. Crazy bastards.)

Also, how would the team be recognized? Would it be a domestic team, or a international team?

Either way, the UEFA is open to the idea:

"The Vatican is a sovereign state recognised by the United Nations and we would have no problem in accepting it as a member."

The biggest problem could be, after games against the Vatican, who would opposing players thank for giving them strength afterwards?

They can't thank Jesus, he's clearly on the opposing team. Nobody wants to touch Allah right now, and Buddha doesn't exactly look like the soccer playing type. There's Ganesha, but Ganesha is an elephant, and we aren't sure that elephants are the most athletic. Not to mention that Ganesha has four arms which could cause problems seeing how you can only use your feet.

This could get interesting.

(UPDATE:In a turn of events that is sure to shock and awe all of us, it turns out that the Vatican was lying. The church?! Lying!? My God, now we have seen it all!!)