Packers Fans Shouldn't Have Children

It's going to be a big weekend up there in Green Bay this week. After all, God Brett Favre will be trying to lead his mighty Packers back to the Super Bowl for the first time in 9 years when the Pack last made a trip to the Super Bowl.

Obviously as somebody who's spent a lot of time in his life arguing with Packers fans about whose team is better, or whose fan base is further proof of the de-evolution of man, I know that Packers fans take their Packers football seriously. As a strong Bears fan, I can respect and understand it.

So I have no doubt that these are stressful times to be living in Green Bay. After all, if the Packers lose this weekend, the city's residents will have to crawl back into their holes until August, and nobody's quite ready for that yet.

Still, it doesn't mean they need to tie their kids up.

Upset that his 7-year-old son wouldn't wear a Green Bay Packers jersey during the team's playoff victory Saturday, a man restrained the boy for an hour with tape and taped the jersey onto him.

Mathew Kowald was cited for disorderly conduct in connection with the incident with his son at their home in Pardeeville, Lt. Wayne Smith of the Columbia County Sheriff's Department said. Pardeeville is about 30 miles north of Madison.

The 36-year-old Kowald was arrested Monday after his wife told authorities about the incident. Kowald was taken to the county jail and held until Wednesday, when he pleaded no contest, paid a fine of $186 and was released.

To make things even worse for Kowald, when he was released on Wednesday he was released to a restraining order from his wife, so he's not allowed any contact with his family. Apparently she doesn't want to wear the Mark Chmura jersey anymore either.

Foul Balls

Speaking Of Idiocy and Green Bay - Apparently Eli Manning is a huge Seinfeld fan, and with the people of Green Bay wanting to do anything in their power to help the Packers get past Eli's Giants this Sunday, they're willing to take drastic measures to ensure Eli is unhappy on Sunday.

They're taking away his Seinfeld.

Jay Zollar, general manager of WLUK, a Fox affiliate in Green Bay, this week made it clear that he, not the Giants quarterback, is the master of that domain.

On a video on the station's Web site, Zollar points at the camera and says, "Eli, no 'Seinfeld' for you!"

Yup, the station has pulled its regularly scheduled 5:30 p.m. Saturday "Seinfeld" rerun in an attempt to disrupt Manning's preparation for Sunday's NFC Championship Game against the Packers.

No word on whether or not there are any plans to tie Eli to a chair and force him to wear a Packers jersey.

The Illini Actually Won A Game! - Sure, it was against one of the few teams in the Big Ten that Illinois can honestly be considered better than, but a win still counts as a win. Illinois beat Michigan on Wednesday night at Assembly Hall to end a 5-game losing streak, including 4 in a row at home, and to notch their first conference victory of the season.

Of course, this doesn't mean that the Illini have turned things around or anything. Still, Bruce Weber would like to see his team use Wednesday's victory to at least try and do something.

"It would make it easier on all of us," Weber said. "Consistent double-digit scoring, seven, eight, nine rebounds [from each], keep Randle out of foul trouble, be active—that's what we envisioned from the get-go.

"They have had their moments, and they have had their moments the other way. We talked about having 15 games left—seven home, seven on the road and one guaranteed neutral-court game at the Big Ten tournament. Now, what will you do with it?"

They'll probably lose, coach.