I Have A Lot Of Nothing To Say

I don't have much to say about yesterday's congressional hearings about whether or not Brian McNamee ever stuck some needles in Roger Clemens' ass. The truth is, I didn't watch a single second of the hearings.

From all the "highlights" I did see and hear throughout the day though, I'd have to say Clemens came out of all the proceedings looking the worst. It's as though he was under the impression that the louder you talk the more innocent you are, and he never seemed to really answer any questions.

So since I didn't really watch it, everybody else is talking about it, and there are no other real big stories in sports to talk about right now, I'm just going to hit a whole bunch of different topics today. It is Valentine's Day after all, so think of today's post as a heart-shaped box full of all different sorts of chocolates.

Foul Balls

Devean George Is Doing Dallas a Favor - I already wrote about the Mavs/Nets trade that didn't happen yesterday thanks to Devean George in The Basketball Diaries this morning, but I didn't say why I thought that George was doing the Mavs a favor.

Did you see all the people the Mavericks were going to send to the Nets for Jason Kidd? Devin Harris, Jerry Stackhouse, DeSagana Diop, Devean George, Maurice Ager, $3 million, two first-round draft picks, a couple of Cowboys cheerleaders, a cowboy hat, 15 head of cattle, and the first born of every family in Dallas.

All for a soon to be 35-year old point guard who isn't going to get the Mavericks to the NBA Finals anyway. If Jason Kidd couldn't lead the Nets to a better record in the Eastern Conference with Richard Jefferson and Vince Carter at his side, what in the hell is he going to do in the Western Conference with Dirk Nowitzki and Josh Howard?

Don't get me wrong, I think Jason Kidd is one of the greatest point guards in the history of the game, but he's not the answer in Dallas. At least not at that cost. Devin Harris is never going to be Jason Kidd, but at 24 he still has all the potential to become one of the top point guards in the NBA for years to come. Kidd has a season or two left in him.

Then there's the fact that the Mavs would have sent two future first round picks to the Nets as well, thereby assuring that in a few years when Kidd does retire, the Mavs will be left with nothing but an aging Dirk Nowitzki and no draft picks to bring in new talent.

Dallas isn't going to get through the Western Conference this season, with or without Kidd, but by not making the trade they give themselves a better chance of getting back to the NBA Finals in the next few years.

Ryan Dempster Is Confident - Ryan Dempster has always been the "class clown" of the Chicago Cubs clubhouse. He's also the team's only ninja. I'm not sure whether Dempster was joking around with the media yesterday, but he made a rather bold statement about what he expects the Cubs to do this season.

"I think we're going to win the World Series, I really do," Dempster told reporters as pitchers and catchers reported to camp. "I wouldn't show up here and have worked as hard as I did, and everyone worked as hard as they did, to not believe that. I think it's funny when people make predictions or they say things and people are like, 'Oh, how can you say that?'

"You believe it. You really do. Enough of all the … curse this, the curse that, the goat, the black cat, or the 100 years [without a championship]. … Whatever it is, we're a better team than we were last year. And last year we made it to the playoffs, and it was a battle to make it, to have a rough April and be 10 [games] down and kind of grind our way to first place. I just feel like our chances are better."

I admire Ryan's confidence, though I'm not sure I can really support what he's saying. Will the Cubs get to the playoffs again this season? Probably, I mean their division was horrible last season and it's only gotten worse this season, so it's damn near impossible for the Cubs to not win the division just by showing up to the park everyday.

Will they win the World Series though? Well, they'd have to win a playoff game first, but if the Colorado Rockies can get to the World Series, I see no reason why the Cubs can't get there. There's no way in hell they'd win a 7-game series against the Red Sox, Angels, Tigers, or Indians, but they can get there.

I Hope Terrelle Pryor Doesn't See This - With the nation's top football recruit, quarterback Terrelle Pryor, still undecided about where he's going to go to school, there's still a lot of recruiting being done by the three teams apparently left on his list: Michigan, Ohio State, and Penn State.

Obviously, I want Pryor to go to Penn State because I'm a Nittany Lions fan, and Michigan and Ohio State suck.

The recruiting isn't just being done by the schools themselves though, as fans have taken to posting YouTube videos on the internet trying to convince Pryor to attend their school.

I'm just praying Pryor hasn't seen the following video because, if he has, I don't think he's going to go to Penn State.

Baseball's Three Ring Circus

Spring training is just getting started, and I plan to start rolling out Foul Balls' very own baseball previews next week, but spring training and my previews aren't the big story in baseball right now. The big story is the one I've been doing everything in my power to avoid talking about, but I've now realized that it's going to be impossible.

Roger Clemens is going to be in front of Congress tomorrow morning playing He Said/He Said with Brian McNamee.

So far the story has taken on O.J. Simpson trial proportions as McNamee busted out needles he said that Clemens used, and even went as far as saying he injected Clemens' wife with HGH for a Sports Illustrated photo shoot.

I'm pretty sure before Roger sits down tomorrow morning, there will be a story released saying that McNamee also injected Roger's kids and dog with HGH, and that McNamee has crudely drawn pictures he made with a box of Crayolas to prove it.

Roger will then counter attack by releasing a YouTube video in which he'll use sock puppets to recreate a scene in which McNamee molests a 10-year old boy.

The whole thing has turned into a circus, and though I'm hopeful that the circus will end tomorrow, I'm not stupid enough to think that will actually be the case. This story won't be going anywhere, the names may change, but the song will remain the same.

Unfortunately, the hearings lost some juice yesterday when it was revealed that Andy Pettite would no longer be testifying in Washington on Wednesday.

New York Yankees pitcher Andy Pettitte, former Mets trainer Kirk Radomski, and former Yankee and Twins player Chuck Knoblauch will not testify before a congressional committee Wednesday in Washington D.C.

The only people now scheduled to testify on Wednesday are pitcher Roger Clemens, former Clemens trainer Brian McNamee and Charlie Scheeler of former Senate majority leader George Mitchell's staff.

"Mr. Knoblauch and Mr. Pettitte answered all the Committee's questions and their testimony at the hearing is not needed," committee chairman Henry Waxman and ranking Republican Tom Davis said in a statement. "Mr. Clemens and Mr. McNamee have also cooperated with the Committee in its investigation."

Now at first this would appear to be good news for Roger. After all, part of McNamee's testimony involves conversations he had with both Pettite and Clemens about HGH. It's not good for Roger though, because the reason Pettite didn't want to testify tomorrow was because he's afraid he's going to get one of his good friends in trouble.

So basically, Andy knows his testimony is going to be pretty damning for Roger. Unfortunately for Roger, they wouldn't let Pettite back out of testifying if they didn't already have enough information from him, and word is that Pettite's affidavit is more supportive of McNamee than it is Clemens.

Andy Pettitte's affidavit helps to support Brian McNamee's version of events that the former trainer gave Roger Clemens steroids and HGH, Rep. Tom Davis told Newsday.

Although Pettitte won't testify at Wednesday's hearings, the left-hander's affidavit will be presented to Clemens at the hearing and will be part of the public record, the newspaper reported.

Davis, R-Va., told Newsday that Clemens says in his affidavit that both Pettitte and McNamee are mistaken in their statements.

As if all this wasn't enough, John Rocker made news yesterday by coming out and saying he failed a drug test back in 2000, and Bud Selig knew all about it and chose to ignore it.

Former major league pitcher John Rocker said Monday that baseball commissioner Bud Selig knew he failed a drug test in 2000 and that doctors for the "league" and the "players association" advised him and several Texas Rangers teammates on how to effectively use steroids.

Rocker, no stranger to controversy, made those comments on Atlanta radio station Rock 100.5.

Later Monday, he told Atlanta sports talk radio station 680 The Fan that "between 40 to 50 percent of baseball players are on steroids" and "in 2000 Bud Selig knew John Rocker was taking the juice."

Then during the same interview, just for fun, Rocker went and said this.

"Bud Selig is a clown, and should do the entire world a favor and kill himself."

And to think, Will Leitch didn't even have to get Rocker drunk first before he started spouting off about all this.

While I don't subscribe to the notion that Bud should kill himself, I do agree with Rocker's assessment that Selig is a clown. Rocker's a clown too, as are Clemens and McNamee.

They're all clowns, even the morons in Congress that think baseball is somehow a government issue.

The circus is in town, ladies and gentlemen. Try not to step in any of the elephant shit.



Foul Balls

Return of the Ninja - In what will probably be the only thing you ever see me write about the Arena Football League, at least here at Foul Balls, we take a trip back in time. As of right now the kicker for the Chicago Bears is Robbie Gould, and he's done a pretty acceptable job in the two years he's been here.

Sure, he can't be counted on from over 45 yards, but get him any closer and he's straight cash, homey. I like Gould, but in truth, he'll never be my favorite kicker to wear a Bears uniform. To find the Bears kicker that currently holds that title, you'll have to go a ways back. Back to a kicker out of Michigan State who had an odd way of contorting himself like a corkscrew before kicking his field goals and extra points.

He moved with the stealth and speed of a ninja, and that's why my friends and I dubbed him as The Ninja. You knew him as Paul Edinger. After Edinger was released by the Bears in 2004, he signed on with the Vikings in 2005.

He's never been heard from since, at least, until now. That's right Arena Football fans, The Ninja has come back home to Chicago.

Paul Edinger--you remember him, he of the corkscrew windup before becoming one of the most accurate kickers in Bears history--has signed a deal to join the Rush of the Arena Football League.

Edinger, drafted in the 6th round out of Michigan State in 2000, kicked for the Bears from 2000-2004. He last kicked in the NFL for Minnesota in 2005 and has been out of the NFL since.

This is truly a great day for crime-fighting, superhero kickers everywhere.

Yet Another Berman Video - This time Chris talks about his former Monday Night Football colleague, Al Michaels.

Must warn you though, some naughty language is involved. After all, it is Chris Berman.

A Trade That Makes No Sense

So apparently Shaquille O'Neal is on the verge of being traded to the Phoenix Suns for Shawn Marion and Marcus Banks. The deal has been agreed to by both sides in principle, but Shaq has to pass a physical first, and the deal could be finalized by the end of today.

This is the type of trade that doesn't happen very often. First off, it involves two stars in Marion and Shaq. Then there's the fact that it was completely unexpected, and nobody saw it coming. Finally, and this is the weirdest part of this deal, it's a bad trade for both teams and it's probably worse for Phoenix.

Let's forget about the fact that it was only a few weeks ago that we were all told that O'Neal would be out for the year with a hip problem. I mean, it's amazing how quickly NBA veterans can heal when they're about to go from a horrible team to a team that has a chance to get to the NBA Finals.

The insane part of this deal is, at 35 years old Shaq is already slowing down, and he was never moving that fast to begin with. Speed isn't generally a trait for 7-foot, 300 pound men. So how in the hell is Shaq going to play in Phoenix's system?

This is a team that lives to run all game. Shaq is a player that prefers to plod his way down the court, set up on the blocks, and go to work.

The deal doesn't really work for Miami, either. Sure, they'll be getting O'Neal and the $40 million left on his contract off their books, and they're getting a great player in Marion, but does he fit in Pat Riley's system?

Marion is the type of player that flourished in Phoenix's high-octane offense. Will he be as valuable playing Pat Riley's half-court offense, where defense is priority? I'm hoping that with both Marion and Dwyane Wade the Heat realize they're going to have to pick up the pace a bit.

Still, the biggest reason the Suns traded Marion was because he was tired of being in Phoenix where he's always felt he was unappreciated. He wanted to get out the shadow of Amare Stoudemire, and to a lesser extent, Steve Nash.

Why is Marion going to feel any different in Miami? Dwyane Wade is already the man there, and if Dwyane was the man while Shaq was in town, Marion isn't going to change that.

Miami though has less to lose because the team wasn't going anywhere this year anyway, and they probably weren't going to be that much better next year if they didn't make a change. The Suns on the other hand, are taking a pretty big risk here.

It could pay off huge because maybe Shaq will be magically healed now that he's out from under Riley and playing on a good team. Maybe combined with Amare Stoudemire, the Suns will then run through San Antonio and Los Angeles and finally get to the NBA Finals.

I highly doubt it though.

Foul Balls

Mr. Clemens Goes To Congress - I'm not going to get into how idiotic I find it that Congress feels the need to waste it's time talking to baseball players about whether or not they stuck a few needles in their ass ten years ago. Sure, there are more important things Congress could be doing, like finding out if the Patriots cheated or not, but hey, I don't vote so I shouldn't tell them what to do.

Anyway, Clemens told Congress the same thing he's been saying to us for weeks now. He hasn't done anything.

The star pitcher gave a sworn deposition for about five hours to congressional lawyers behind closed doors Tuesday, addressing his former personal trainer's allegations. And this time, Clemens was under oath.

''I just want to thank the committee, the staff that I just met with. They were very courteous,'' the seven-time Cy Young Award winner said, wearing a pinstriped gray suit instead of a pinstriped New York Yankees uniform. ''It was great to be able to tell them what I've been saying all along -- that I've never used steroids or growth hormone.''

See what Roger did there? He admitted he's done HGH in his denial. He said he hasn't done steroids or growth hormone. No where did he say he's never done human growth hormone.

Thought you'd get away with it, didn't you Clemens?

Meanwhile, In CrazyLand - As a sports fan that generally considers himself pretty educated and knowledgeable about the world outside of a sporting event, I can fully admit there are some sports fans out there that are complete idiots.

A lot of them live in Green Bay, but not all of them. They also have their fair share up in New England (Okay, we have some here too.) where I'd like to introduce you to the following moron. His name is Victor Thompson, and he's heartbroken.

If Victor Thompson had hair covering his Patriots-emblazoned skull, he admits he probably would have been pulling it out Sunday evening as New England went down to defeat in Super Bowl XLII.

For the New York Giants, the 17-14 win was the realization of one of the biggest upsets in NFL history.

But the man who tattooed his head like Patriots quarterback Tom Brady's helmet is definitely in the dumps.

"The minute the Giants got that (last second) touchdown I knew it was done ... it killed me," said Thompson.

Thompson, 39, of Laconia has gained both local and national attention for a stunt that saw him getting the Patriots logo tattooed on both sides of his shaved head and Brady's number 12 on the back along with the American flag.

Now I don't think I need to explain to you, the intelligent reader, just how stupid what Thompson has done is. What makes this "story" for me though is this. Emphasis is mine.

He noted that he still has plans to get New England's other championship Super Bowl years tattooed on his head.

Thompson said the trophy will have to wait.

"Maybe next year. As Brady said (after the game) ... we will be back."

Until then Thompson has tentative plans to get his entire head tattooed silver like the real helmet and he is still working on getting Brady himself to sign his skull with a tattoo gun to make it official.

Even Britney Spears thinks this guy is nuts.

Thank God Almighty, We Are Free At Last!

He's gone!

Thank you, Jesus, he is gone!!

Let January 29th, 2008 go down as one of the greatest days in Chicago White Sox history. I feel like a Russian on the day Stalin died. Not even the 30 MPH winds, and -20 wind chill in Chicago could cool the warm feelings flooding my heart on Tuesday night.

Johan Santana is gone. Not only out of the AL Central, but out of the American League.

That's right, Cubs fans, he's your problem now.

...on Tuesday afternoon, the New York Mets agreed to a tentative deal with the Minnesota Twins for arguably the best pitcher on the planet, Johan Santana, for a package of four prospects.

Santana has a full no-trade clause and can veto the deal unless he gets a contract extension, and it's expected that the Mets and Santana will begin negotiating as soon as possible. New York and Santana have until 5 p.m. ET Friday to reach an agreement, a baseball official told The Associated Press, on condition of anonymity. Deadlines have been extended in the past, however.

If Santana agrees to a deal -- and it is thought he will seek a six-year, $150 million contract -- then he also would have to pass a physical.

Blah, blah, blah, who the hell cares? He's gone!

The Mets already knew that Santana is going to want $150 million, so I see no reason why they're going to have a problem giving it to him, and I have no doubt he's going to pass his physical.

No longer will I have to suffer watching Johan pick apart my beloved White Sox five or six times a season, and when you consider the fact the Twins also lost Torii Hunter and Carlos Silva this offseason, we might actually be able to beat them consistently.

Third place is ours, bitches!

Of course, this is a sad day for Twins fans, as it's never easy to lose a pitcher of Johan's caliber. For those poor souls who are reading this, I offer you these soothing words of the great Nelson Munce.

Foul Balls

Alonzo Spellman: Still Crazy After All These Years - Do you remember Alonzo Spellman? He's one of my favorite Chicago Bears of all time. Not for what he did on the football field, but for all the crazy shit he did off of it.

There was the time in 1998 when he barricaded himself in his publicist's house after a doctor was late for an appointment, and threatened suicide. It took Mike Singletary to convince him to go to a hospital and get himself checked out, where it was discovered Alonzo had bi-polar disorder.

Everything was fine for a while, since Alonzo was taking his medications, and he was able to play a few more years with the Cowboys and Lions. Then he retired, and figured he didn't need his medication anymore.

His assumption was wrong.

On July 23rd, 2002 Spellman was on a flight from Cincinnati to Philadelphia when he lost it. He started screaming that the plane was going to crash, and then started yelling at other passengers and even threatened to kill members of the flight crew. The plane had to make an emergency landing, and afterwards Alonzo was sentenced to 18 months in a federal prison for what he'd done.

Then Alonzo was quiet for awhile, until now, that is.

Former Bears defensive lineman Alonzo Spellman was arrested Tuesday after Tulsa police fired pepper-spray pellets into his car following a 20-minute chase.

Spellman was booked into the Tulsa County Jail on complaints of eluding, assault with a deadly weapon on a police officer, resisting arrest and driving without a license, jail records show. His bond was set at $10,700 and Spellman remained jailed Tuesday evening.

The chase began at 12:23 p.m. after officers responded to a disturbance at a convenience store in midtown Tulsa, police spokesman Leland Ashley said. When officers arrived, Spellman got into a green Chrysler Pacifica and drove away, Ashley said.

"He took us on a little pursuit," Ashley said. "We had to use stop sticks that took out three of his tires."

After the vehicle stopped, the 36-year-old Spellman refused to get out of the car for about 20 minutes until officers fired "pepper bullets" through the windows.

Oh, Alonzo. How I've missed you.

How's Rocket Going To Get Out Of This One? - While I've never been a fan of Roger Clemens, I have to admit, I've admired his fervor in defending himself ever since he was named in the Mitchell Report.

First there was the denial, then there was the taped conversation with Brian McNamee, followed by the 60 Minutes interview, and finally we had the "War and Peace"-esque statistical report Clemens released to prove steroids had nothing to do with his success late in his career.

It's going to be interesting to see how Rocket tries to get out of this one, as his friend, and fellow Mitchell Reporter, Andy Pettite is willing to testify that he and Clemens talked about HGH on a number of occasions.

"Based on what we know, there was a situation where Andy was speaking to Roger in Brian's presence, then Andy came over to Brian and essentially said, 'Why didn't you tell me about this stuff?' He referred to HGH," [Brian McNamee's lawyer Earl] Ward said. "Brian discouraged him and then several months later, when he [Pettitte] got injured, he came back and asked Brian about it, and that's when Brian injected him. We believe that based on the fact that Andy came to Brian and asked him about HGH, it was Roger who told Andy about HGH and that's why he asked Brian about it."

Richard Emery, another lawyer for McNamee, said his client and Pettitte also discussed steroids use by Clemens.

"Pettitte is certainly going to tell the truth and if he tells the truth everything will be fine," Emery said.

"There are a number of conversations where Pettitte and Brian talked about Clemens' use. I think there is everything to believe Pettitte is not a liar."

If I'm Andy Pettite, I'd be expecting a phone call this morning.

The Single Greatest Moment Of My Life - You know, during the few years that I've been blogging at Foul Balls, and now at FanHouse, I've had a few highs in my career.

There was the time my post on Ron Santo was featured in the Chicago Sun-Times.

There was the time Foul Balls was mentioned in the New York Times.

There was the time when I was mentioned by name on ESPN.com

None of those moments can even hold a candle to this one.

As someone who's loved The Dugout so much, for so very long, this is the greatest honor of my lifetime.

Well, until Leitch lets me write the White Sox preview on Deadspin in March. But still, it's pretty fucking awesome.

Long Live The Republic of New Fornellia!

Rick Ankiel Loves Some HGH

Another chapter has been added to the fairy tale that is the life of Rick Ankiel. If you're somehow unfamiliar with Ankiel's story, here's a quick summary.

He came up as a pitcher with the Cardinals, and was awesome. Then all of a sudden, he couldn't throw a strike to save his life. He went down to the minors to work it out, and it never happened. So Ankiel then decided to become an outfielder, and spent more time down in the minors learning the position.

Then this season he was called back up to the Cardinals as an outfielder, homered in his first game, and has torn it up ever since. Now after only 23 games with the Cardinals, Ankiel is hitting .358 with 9 home runs and 29 RBI. Hell, on Thursday alone he had two homers and 7 RBI against Pittsburgh.

The secret to Rick's success? Hard work and dedication. Oh, and apparently a healthy dose of HGH.

St. Louis Cardinals outfielder Rick Ankiel, who punctuated a storybook comeback from pitching travails by homering twice with 7 RBIs Thursday, joined the list of athletes linked to a Florida-based steroids investigation.

The New York Daily News reported Friday that Ankiel received a 12-month supply of human growth hormone in 2004 from a Florida pharmacy that was part of a national illegal prescription drug-distribution operation, citing records its reporters saw. That Orlando outfit, Signature Pharmacy, has been implicated in a steroids investigation run by Albany County (N.Y.) District Attorney P. David Soares, which has resulted in 22 indictments and several Florida clinic raids.

Ankiel's HGH prescriptions, including Saizen and Genotropin, were signed by Florida physician William Gogan, who provided them through a Palm Beach Gardens clinic called The Health and Rejuvenation Center, or THARC, the newspaper reported.

If a player is known to have been using HGH, MLB can suspend them for 50 games. The good news for Ankiel though is that he hasn't been accused of any wrongdoing by the authorities, and he stopped receiving shipments of HGH in 2005, when MLB made it illegal.

So whether or not Ankiel is going to face any kind of punishment for this remains to be seen, but no matter what happens, it's going to put a dark cloud over his story.

Barry Bonds Called Bob Costas a Midget

If you happened to tune into On the Record with Bob Costas on HBO recently, you're familiar with the last episode in which Costas interviews Curt Schilling and Patrick Arnold. Arnold is the man who created HGH, and the three of them spent a lot of time ripping Barry Bonds a new one.

Well, Bonds responded in his typical classy and restrained demeanor.

"You mean that little midget man who absolutely knows jackshit about baseball, who never played the game before?" Bonds said to a handful of reporters before Wednesday night's game. "You can tell Bob Costas what I called him."

Ok then, I will. Hey, Bob!? Barry thinks you're a midget that knows jackshit about baseball.

I'm not sure if Costas will have a response to what Barry said, but I don't think he should make one. No, the only way to solve a situation such as this is a battle royale.

One man. One midget. A couple of knives, and a whole lot of anger and moxie. Put it on HBO, and you got a hit!

(via With Leather)

HGH Charges Rock Annual Easter Event

Just moments after being declared the winner of the nation's annual Easter Egg Roll, three-year-old Kaitlyn Miller's victory has been cast into doubt.

French newspaper L'Equippe, citing anonymous sources, has revealed that Kaitlyn, a Bethesda, Maryland pre-schooler, tested postive for HGH. It's understood the French newspaper received this information from a source within the laboratory that conducted the testing.

Kaitlyn's father, 36-year-old Jeffrey Miller, expressed surprise at the accusation. "I'm sure my little girl will be cleared of all charges," Miller said. "Kaitlyn won this fair and square. It has to be someone else's sample. This rush to judgment is hurting an innocent child."

Poppy Miller, Kaitlyn's mom, 32, strongly defended her daughter. "Um....what the fuck? Human growth hormone? She's a human. She has hormones. She's growing. She's three friggin years old! And by the way, how the hell did they get a urine sample from my kid?"

A representative of the World Anti-Doping Agency (WADA) stated that Mrs. Miller's comments constitute an admission of guilt and called for Kaitlyn's immediate suspension. Additionally, WADA has forfeited Kaitlyn's first prize winings, a Dora the Explorer Magical Castle bedroom playset, which will now be given to the second-place egg roller, five-year-old Francoise Depardieu, a tourist from Orly, France.

Kaitlyn, when asked for a comment, proclaimed her innocence and stated she would not return the first prize. "Dora mine! No take Dora from me!"

Let's Get Real About HGH

I have a friend in his mid-thirties, a former professional athlete who retired early due to injury. Though he takes incredible care of himself, the physical pain he has suffered progressively worsened, getting so bad that he was forced to give up most of his athletic activities, including his new love, surfing.

I just saw him this week and he was transformed. Symptom-free, he was taking out his mountain bike and bitching about the bad surf. It was shocking and wonderful to see him so healthy. Of course, I asked him what happened to change it all.

He offered up a simple answer: "HGH."

In that moment, I realized that it's not only futile to try to ban HGH from pro sports but just plain cruel.

Everyone has read about retired linebacker Ted Johnson who recently went public with brain damage he's suffered from multiple concussions while playing for the New England Patriots.

It's caused a flurry of hand wringing throughout the NFL and the media. Some blame poor medical judgment calls in the NFL. Some blame Big Bad Belichik in particular. Some blame the whole "rub dirt in it" pro football culture.

But with all the finger pointing and collective head-scratching on how best to improve the health of the NFL player, there's a fact that has gone completely unnoticed:

HGH can mitigate long-term damage from concussions.

Tom Farrey wrote a great article making the case for HGH in ESPN: The Magazine a couple weeks ago but it went pretty much unnoticed cuz it came out during the playoffs. In the article, he discusses how concussions cause hormone deficiencies and how that adversely affects the rest of the body's functioning:

At the base of the brain, encased in a small, bony shell, is a pea-size gland called the pituitary, which secretes hormones that help regulate everything from mood to energy level. For years, the gland had been overlooked in discussions of head trauma. But in the late 1990s, UCLA neurosurgeon Daniel Kelly noticed that many of his head-injury patients suffered from symptoms associated with pituitary failure: depression, fatigue, anxiety, poor concentration. His findings, which he published in 2000, have led to at least eight studies on three continents, which together involved more than 600 subjects. Each study confirmed the link between traumatic brain injury (TBI) and a loss of hormonal function. The most common deficiencies in men were those of growth hormone, which occurred in 15% to 20% of cases, and of testosterone, in 10% to 15%.

Most of the subjects in these studies had suffered a moderate or severe TBI with some bleeding in the head during a car accident, a fall or some other nonsports-related activity. But, Kelly says, "if you look at the literature, there's a small but definite component of patients with milder head injuries who also lose hormonal function." One study, in Italy, found pituitary dysfunction in as many as 37.5% of patients with mild TBI, the same level of injury NFL players typically incur when they get dinged.

Researchers have proven that growth hormone deficiency is common among boxers. A test showed that 45% of boxers and 23% kickboxers had hormone deficiencies compared to 5% for the general population.

It doesn't take a genius to extrapolate that out to football players. In fact, research done by the NFL itself shows that collisions in a game are more physically traumatic than punches in a ring:

"Think of being hit by a small car that is really fast and by a large truck that is not as fast but has much more mass behind it," says David Hovda, director of the UCLA Brain Injury Research Center. "The damage from the truck collision is higher." Even on the college level, some collisions register at more than 120 G's, the equivalent of a severe car crash.

We're couch-potato thrill junkies, demanding more from our athletes every day. We insist they put their bodies at risk week after week so that we can be entertained, amused, amazed. We expect them to get up from hard hits and shake them off as if characters in our video games. And through all this, we demand their bodies remain "pure."

But we don't think much nor do we care about them after they leave the field.

So what, you say, they have free will, then they should quit. Well, Tiki Barber understood that and decided his future health is more important than a couple more years on our plasmas as a football star.

But let's be honest, Tiki's got bigger payday potential off the field than on it.

Ted Johnson is no Tiki Barber. Nor are the hundreds of journeymen NFL players who face an uncertain future after they walk off the field. So they stay and their conditions worsen. And that's partly because the actions they could take to stay healthy are banned by NFL elders and shunned by a willfully ignorant public.

Why should a player like Ted Johnson suffer a lifetime of hell when medication could have helped him while he was playing? Why do we demand these men be superhuman? Why can't they have access to the same remedies we mortals receive to heal from injuries far less severe? Why can't NFL medicine take the leap into the 21st century?

For the sake of those guys you enjoy watching every week, it's about time we distinguish between doping and healing. Cuz there's a big, big difference.