This Is Why Lance Briggs Needed Money

Remember last year when Lance Briggs was threatening to sit out the season because the Bears had franchised him, and he wanted a long-term deal? Remember how ridiculous it was to hear a guy complain about the fact he was only going to be making $7.2 million?

Then the season came along, Lance played better than just about everybody on the defense, and he signed a contract with the Bears for less money than he was originally offered. Personally, I found it pretty funny that after all the crap he pulled, Briggs ended up with a smaller payday than anybody thought he'd get. Hell, even after signing the damn thing, he still wasn't exactly thrilled with it.

The question is: Why would Briggs accept less money to stay with the Bears when he was previously threatening to leave the team for paying him more? Is he just stupid? Insane? Was he just desperate to buy a new Lamborghini?

Nope, none of the above. It turns out it's just all those damn mouths to feed.

Chicago Bears linebacker Lance Briggs is close to settling a high-profile paternity claim filed against him, but his baby mama drama may just be starting.

In court Wednesday, Briggs' ex-girlfriend Brittini Tribbett, 21, again pleaded for Briggs to provide adequate emotional and financial support for their baby girl, while another pregnant woman stood by, listening to talk of how she's set to deliver a Briggs baby.

Briggs, 27, wasn't in court. He is living in Arizona with yet another woman who recently gave birth to another daughter of Briggs, those involved in the case alleged.

Tribbett's attorney, Enrico Mirabelli, argued that in a sworn deposition, Briggs denied knowing Yesenaya Toledo, a 20-year-old Chicago woman due to deliver a baby this summer.

First of all, kudos to Stephen Patterson for fitting the phrase "baby mama drama" into an actual newspaper article. Nice to see the papers are finally adapting to this Maury Povich world we live in.

Speaking of which, wouldn't it save Lance a lot of money to just go on Maury to find out if he's the father, instead of paying all these lawyer fees? Drew Rosenhaus should get on that.

Anyway, where was I? Ahh, yes, Lance Briggs and his super sperm that seem to impregnate any woman who gets within 15 feet of him.

Just a little piece of advice for you, Lance. If the kids are yours, just pay the damn money. It's not like you're scraping by. I know of at least $19 million you have in your pocket already. Also, maybe start investing in some condoms. I know it doesn't feel the same, but they're a lot cheaper in the long run.

You don't want to waste all your money on your unwanted responsibilities, do you?

Another Witness Comes Forward to Back Cedric Benson

There's a new witness coming out in support of Cedric Benson's claims that it was the LCRA officers who were abusive of Benson, and not the other way around as they would have us believe.

The witness is Toby Patch, and though he wasn't on Cedric's boat, he was at the nearby Emerald Point Marina.

"As they were taking him up the dock, they stopped, he said, 'I am fine, I can continue walking,' and they put their legs behind his knees and knocked him over his knees and started hog-carrying him," Patch told KXAN-TV in Austin.

Near the parking area, Patch says the treatment of Benson worsened.

"They ended up--I don't know why--but laid him on his back, I heard him say, 'Please don't pepper spray me, please don't pepper spray me,'" Patch said. "It was uncalled for, it was ludicrous, no point for it."

Patch is the second witness to come forward backing up Benson's claims that he was mistreated, following in the footsteps of boat passenger Elizabeth Cartwright earlier this week. So it's starting to look like my initial feelings as to what happened here were right.

Still, even if Cedric is vindicated and has the charges dropped, he's still going to suffer for the incident. His next court date is May 19th, which also happens to be the day the Bears start OTA's. Cedric can't really afford to miss many practices seeing as how he's fighting to keep his job.

Passenger on Benson's Boat: 'I've Never Heard or Seen Cedric That Scared'

Ever since the story first broke about Cedric Benson's arrest last weekend in Austin, Texas, Benson has maintained that the story the police are telling wasn't the way things actually went down. Cedric's maintained that he wasn't drunk, he didn't resist the officers, and that the only people who were out of line that day were the police.

The problem is that nobody had been supporting his claims. Until now, anyway. A friend of Cedric that was on the phone has come out and said that Benson's tale of the story was a lot closer to the truth than anything the police are saying.

A female passenger on Cedric Benson's boat Saturday night in Austin, Texas, was concerned enough about his safety after police took him into custody to phone her parents and urge them to call 911, the Tribune has learned.

"I called my dad and told him, 'Call 911, my black friend is getting beaten up by police on Lake Travis,' " said Elizabeth Cartwright, 22, a friend of Benson's from the University of Texas. "It's more what I heard than what I saw. I have never heard or seen Cedric that scared."

See, now if you need further proof that the cops in this incident were doing nothing but punishing Cedric for "boating while black", you need look no further than Benson's friend. She's his friend, and she's racist too!

I guess telling her dad that her friend was getting beat up by police just wouldn't suffice, she had to throw in the "my black friend." Don't you remember him, father? That charming negro boy I was telling you about!

Anyway, she says she's willing to testify on Cedric's behalf once this gets to court, and that her white boyfriend has dozens of photos to support her and Benson's story.

Cedric Benson Had A Tough Week

As I'm sure you've all heard by now, Bears running back Cedric Benson got into a bit of trouble over the weekend, when he was arrested for boating while intoxicated. While I try to remember a time when I was on a boat where either I, or the person driving the boat, didn't have a beer in their hand, here are some of the particulars for you to go over.

Lower Colorado River Authority police arrested the Bears running back, who played at the University of Texas in Austin, on Lake Travis during a random safety inspection. An LCRA spokesman said Benson, who failed a sobriety "float test" (an abbreviated version of a field sobriety test) on his 37-foot yacht, argued over taking a follow-up test on land and refused to put on a life jacket. LCRA officers said they attempted to arrest Benson at that time but that he refused to cooperate and was pepper-sprayed. He was booked at 11:24 p.m. Saturday at the Travis County Jail and was out early Sunday morning on $14,500 bond.

Now without being there, this is how I picture the whole thing went down.

River Authority Cop #1: Man, where in life did we mess up bad enough to become River Authority cops?

River Authority Cop #2: I don't know, hoss. I don't know.

RAC #1: Not a day goes by where I don't think about killing maself.

RAC#2: Me too.

RAC#1: Want to end it all right here? Together?

RAC#2: You know what? Fuck it. Let's do..

RAC#1: Wait a second, what's that? It's a boat! Let's go mess with them, and then kill ourselves.

RAC #2: Sounds like a plan to me!

(the River Authority cops then go over to Cedric Benson's boat, and climb on board)

RAC#1: Be careful man, there's black people on this boat.

RAC#2: Way ahead of you, hoss. Already got ma pepper spray ready.

RAC#1: Good. Juss let me do all the talkin.

(Cedric Benson then approaches the cops, takes two steps and falls down, but then gets back up)

Cedric Benson: Damn waves! There a problem here officer?

RAC#1: You drunk, boy?

Benson: Drunk? Oh hell no.

RAC#1: Then why you fall down back there?

Benson: Oh, I'm never able to take more than two or three steps without falling down or gettin hurt. It's a condition I have called "major suckitis."

RAC#1: You sure you ain't drunk?

Benson: Pretty damn sure.

RAC#1: He's a cussin at us! And resisting arrest! SPRAY HIM, DAMMIT, SPRAY HIM!!

(RAC#2 then sprays Benson in the eyes for 25 minutes)

Benson: Aaaaaah!!

Then the cops dragged the blind bastard off the boat and arrested him.

For the most part, Benson agrees with my version of the story.

"There was no resistance on my part," Benson told the Tribune on Sunday night. "Was I drunk? No."

Benson said there was alcohol on his boat but that he was not intoxicated and the boat was stationary when police arrived. He said he fully cooperated with officers and that this was the sixth time he had been questioned by lake police in the year that he has owned the boat.

"They gave me a field sobriety test, told me to say my ABCs and told me to count from 1 to 4 up and down," Benson said of Saturday's incident. "I'm thinking, I passed all the tests, did everything right. Then the officer told me we needed to go to land to take more tests. I politely asked him why we needed to go to land to take more tests when I took every test. Then he sprayed me with mace, on his boat.

"I'm not handcuffed. I'm not under arrest. I'm not threatening him. I'm not pushing him. I'm not touching him. And he sprays me right in my eye."

Benson said by that time, he was far removed from the family and friends left on his boat, a group that included his mother.

"Nobody saw what he did to me," Benson said. "I started screaming for my mother to come. That's when they put me under arrest. And the officer threw a life jacket over my head.

"Once we got to land, the Travis County police grabbed me and kicked my feet from under me. So I landed on my back while I was handcuffed. They held me down and held the water hose over my face. I couldn't breathe, I'm choking, I'm begging the cops, 'Please stop. Please stop.' Then they picked me up and dragged me backward toward their car. And I'm still being polite, asking them, 'Sir, could you please allow me to walk like a man to your cop car?' They just kept dragging me on."

Okay, so it's not exactly the same, but whatever. Sports blogs aren't known for their accuracy in reporting, ain't that right, Buzz?

No matter what actually happened, this was just the crowning jewel on what was a craptastic week for Cedric. It all started on Sunday when the Bears drafted Matt Forte in the 2nd round of the draft, effectively making it official that Benson is a bust, and there's also a chance he won't have a job once the season starts. Now this. I'd almost feel bad for him, you know, if he didn't suck so bad.

A Rough Draft

I'm going to get to my "expert" breakdowns of each Bears draft pick from over the weekend shortly, but before I do, I just want to express how much I hated this draft. While I don't really like taking offensive lineman in the first round, it's just not much fun, I completely understood and agreed with the move to take Chris Williams. Even if my heart wanted the Bears to go with local boy and Illinois standout Rashard Mendenhall.

Where I started to get pissed off was when Mendenhall was sliding down the board, and the Bears didn't take the opportunity to trade up and draft him. Instead, we ended up taking some running back I never saw play named Matt Forte in the 2nd round. Granted, he could turn out to be the next Walter Payton (nobody knew a damn thing about him when the Bears drafted him, either), but at this point I think Mendenhall would have been the better option.

Then after that, things got even worse. Instead of taking a quarterback, the Bears continued to live in denial and stick by Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton. Oh, and they decided to draft a bunch of guys who can't stay healthy, or have a history of disciplinary problems.

Fantastic.

Anyway, onto each pick in and of itself. Now, obviously, some of these guys I don't know very well, but I'll go off of what I read from places like Scouts Inc and what not.

1. Chris Williams-OT-Vanderbilt- Like I said earlier, I'm fine with this pick. The Bears biggest need in this draft was a tackle because, let's face it, it doesn't matter who your quarterback or running back are if there's nobody blocking for them. Williams is a guy who could be our starting left tackle when we open against the Colts, and he allows John Tait to move back to right tackle, and in one fell swoop the Bears improve their line in two areas. Oh, and don't give me the "he doesn't have a football demeanor" crap because he didn't get into a fight with some guy at the Senior Bowl. Yeah, because Orlando Pace, Jonathan Ogden and Willie Roaf were guys who tried to rip the heads off of d-lineman. Please, that's a bunch of crap. It's not a o-lineman's job to kill, it's his job to block.
2. Matt Forte-RB-Tulane- I've never seen Matt Forte run a single play in his college career. I just don't get to see to many Tulane games. From what I've read on him though, and I've read a lot, I hear he's a strong between the tackles guy who can move the pile, but doesn't really have the speed on the second level to break long runs. Gee, that's exactly what we need in our backfield, another guy who can't break a long run. I've also read comparisons to Edgerrin James though, and if that's even close to being true, welcome to the team, Matt!
3. Earl Bennett-WR-Vanderbilt- Bennett is a guy who I have gotten a chance to see play a bit in recent years, and the best way I can think of describing how he'll fit in the NFL is a Bobby Engram type guy in the slot, but with more speed. That's not a bad thing to have at all in my opinion. Does have a habit of dropping passes that are thrown behind him though, and with our quarterbacks, that's not a good thing.
4. Marcus Harrison-DT-Arkansas- Ladies and gentleman, meet Tank Johnson Jr. It was with this pick that the Bears started trending towards convicts and creampuffs. Harrison has a lot of talent, but when he wasn't spending his time injured much of the last few seasons, he was spending it getting busted for marijuana and ecstasy. Also, I was pissed off about this pick because John David Booty was still available, and I really wanted us to take another quarterback in this draft.
   
5. Craig Steltz-S-LSU- Steltz is a guy I saw a ton of in college. Here's what I like about him: he's an absolute ballhawk and playmaker of the Mike Brown type. He just has a knack for making big interceptions at very opportune times. The drawbacks are, just like Mike Brown, he's too slow to cover a slot receiver one on one, and will get burned deep by speedy NFL receivers. The one area he's not like Mike Brown? He's not worth much in run support.
6. Zack Bowman-CB-Nebraska- I haven't seen much of Bowman the last few years, but not because I haven't seen Nebraska play. No, it's because Bowman has spent the vast majority of the past two seasons on the sidelines balancing on a pair of crutches. Again, instead of taking a quarterback, the Bears decided to make a reach on a corner. He has good size and speed, but if he can't stay on the field, then what the hell is the point?
7. Kellen Lewis-TE-Michigan State- This move confused me at first, but the more I thought about it, the more I liked it. It seems odd that the Bears would draft another tight end after spending their first round pick on Greg Olson last season, but Lewis is nearly 6'7 and will provide a very big target for whoever's playing quarterback in the red zone. Plus, with our thin receiver corps, we can use all the hands we can get. He did get suspended for four games in college for assault though, but I guess that's good for his "football demeanor."
8. Ervin Baldwin-DE-Michigan State- Baldwin is another player from MSU that I'm familiar with, and he's the type of guy the Bears like at DE. He's quick off the edge, and can be very disruptive in the backfield, but he's not much at the point of attack when trying to stop the run. He's basically another Mark Anderson type, though not as strong a pass rusher.
9. Chester Adams-G-Georgia- I don't know much about Adams. Still, I don't think I have too because he'll be nothing more than depth on the line, and as a 7th round pick he's not exactly guaranteed a spot on the roster. In fact, he may be better off with a position change to tackle, where he may be better suited on the right side.
   
10. Joey LaRocque-OLB-Oregon State- Don't know much about LaRocque as I don't see much of Oregon State. From what I read though, he's slow and not very athletic. Oh, and he's had troubles with his hamstring. Sweet.
11. Kirk Barton-OT-Ohio State- Very familiar with Barton, and he's basically the opposite of Chris Williams. Not much of an athlete, but he does have a mean streak. Unfortunately, I think the only reason he's going to be getting angry in the NFL is because the defensive end he's trying to block keeps blowing by him. Just ask any defensive end from Florida or LSU the last few seasons.
12. Marcus Monk-WR-Arkansas- Loved this pick, excellent value at the end of the draft. I saw a lot of Monk at Arkansas. He's big (6'4) and ran a 4.45 forty, so though he's not a blazer, he's not slow either. He's also very sure handed and can get up in the air to go after the ball in traffic. In other words, he could prove to be a very valuable asset in the red zone and on third downs. Don't be surprised if he comes out of nowhere and gets some quality playing time, especially if he improves his route running.

Jerry Angelo Has a Lot of Kids

As the saga of Brian Urlacher's contract situation goes on at Halas Hall, Jerry Angelo spoke with the media yesterday about the NFL draft, but as was expected, he also had to deal with a lot of questions about Urlacher.

Angelo said that the Bears don't "negotiate through the media" and then went on to negotiate through the media. Basically, Jerry came out and said he doesn't care what Urlacher wants, he's not going to get any sweeter an offer than the one the Bears already made to him.

"You're not going to have one big happy family," Angelo said. "You who have kids and raise families understand it doesn't happen in your homes, and it certainly isn't going to happen at Halas Hall when you have 53 kids and we have to make every one of them happy. It's just not reality."

"Fifty-three people want to be treated special. How in the heck would we be able to run a business if we acquiesce to every situation from every player when they come to us? It's just not practical."

While I understand what Angelo is trying to say here, to try and say that Urlacher is just another player on the team seems a bit ridiculous. Urlacher's been the best player on the team since he was drafted in 2000 (well, maybe not the last two seasons with Lance Briggs). It's not exactly a crazy idea to give the best player on the team some special treatment, as it happens pretty often throughout the league.

Frankly, treating Urlacher the same way as the 53rd man on the roster is idiotic.

Still, I understand where Angelo is coming from here, and where the Bears are coming from as a whole. Nobody in the organization forced Urlacher to sign that 9-year deal back in 2003, though when he did, it was one of the biggest contracts in the history of the league for a defensive player.

If Brian didn't realize then that signing a 9-year deal meant that at some point the salary structure would become outdated, that's his fault. Just about any fan who follows football closely knew it would happen, so how could he not? Did he sign the thing thinking that the Bears would just bend to his will when he felt the contract wasn't valuable enough anymore?

If that's the case, Brian took a measured risk, and considering the Bears history of paying their players, it was a dumb risk to take. One he's truly paying the price for now.

Let's Stop Living in the Past, Chicago

You may remember a few weeks ago when we held a little contest here at Foul Balls for the NCAA tournament. We had a pool where readers were free to enter, with the winner of the pool winning the right to write a free post here. Well, Dr. C of Chicago Bull won the pool, and he got his free post. Here it is.

Before I take you through my little spiel here (he's a big dumb animal, folks); I would like to thank the Rockchalk Jayhawks for propelling me to victory to write on "Fornelli Fantasyland" also known as Foul Balls. For those of you who don't know me (and judging from the Sitemeter, you don't!) I'm Dr. C from Chicago Bull. I post infrequently, drink too often, and hate Juan Uribe with a passion. In other words, I'm the blogging version of Danny Pasqua: I have a decent nickname, do something good every once in a while, and make you wonder when something better will come along.

Speaking of coming along, were just days away from one of my favorite weekends: The NFL draft. I find few things in life more enjoyable then watching the scrolling ticker repeat the draft order with teams' associated picks. I love watching the gravitational pull of analysis that floats around Mel Kiper's head much like the rings around Saturn.

Unfortunately, something else has it's own gravitational pull around here in Chicago that seems inescapable when you mention a certain NFL team. It's like a black hole of pride that everyone trumpets around the area. Broadcasters pound it in your head at least 20 times during the course of the season. The measuring stick that every team in the past 23 years has been prodded with: The 85' Bears.

What wasn't there to like? Da Coach, Payton, The punky QB, the 4-6 Buddy Ryan Defense. The Super Bowl Shuffle. All of it is something we'll probably never see again. And that's why I'm imploring all of you: LET IT GO.

With every passing year that the Bears fail to win the big one, the ominous year dropping becomes an almost Cubs like "Wait Til Next Year. " At least we had 85'. For me, I don't get to say that. I was a bald-headed drooling 1-year old in 85'. I do not get such fabulous memories to look back on. Instead, my earliest Bears memories consist of Jim Harbaugh coughing up another lead. Of Mike Tomczak coming in and fucking things up even more. PT Willis. Steve Walsh...Garbage.

I am so sick of hearing about the 85' Bears that I don't ever want to hear their names again. Dent, Hampton, Fencik, Suhey, Gault. Banish these thoughts. You know what's worse? How much the current players must hate that team. Could you possibly imagine how many questions they must have gotten during the week leading up to Super Bowl XLI?

Is this team good enough to win it all like the 85' Bears? Do you think your defense is similar? Do you know any of the players from that team? That would be equivocal to spending time at a family reunion. A endless cavalcade of what is your name? What do you like to do during your free time? Are you enjoying your refreshment? Fuck and no.

The only problem with this reunion is it's not a 4 hour event; its revolving door that comes around all season.

I understand that everyone will always have a special place in their blue and orange colored beer guts for that team, and as well they should. Having seen the Bulls dynasty take place and the 05' White Sox tear through the postseason, I know that special feeling one gets when you reflect back. But please, I ask you. That was then, and this is now. Let the 85' Bears rest in peace.

Asshole Of The Week: Rod Blagojevich

Welcome to Asshole Of The Week, where every Friday your trusty Foul Balls editor picks out the one person from the previous seven days who makes him think, "Man, what an asshole." It could be anybody from an athlete, an owner, someone in the media, or just anybody who happens to catch my ire.

Our inaugural Asshole is Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich.

I had the first Asshole Of The Week post written and all ready to go, with the maiden Asshole set to be NBA commissioner David Stern for the recent fiasco that is the impending move of the Seattle Supersonics to Oklahoma City. Then late on Thursday I saw a comment left in High Five from loyal reader and commenter, JayBandit. What was it about?

Well, Jay came across a blog post about our wonderful Governor Rod Blagojevich. Now, I've never been a big fan of Blago for various reasons. None of which really have anything to do with politics.

There's the fact that for some reason, even though he's the governor of the entire state of Illinois, he spends the majority of his time in Chicago instead of the state's capital, Springfield. A minor offense, sure, but it's an annoyance.

More recently, there was the law passed in the state of Illinois that prohibited smoking in public venues such as bars. As someone who smokes, and spends a lot of his time in bars, this pissed me off greatly. Aren't bars supposed to be a place where you can get away from the daily grind, and partake in some good old fashioned vice? Now I can't smoke there? What's next? No beer at baseball games?

Speaking of baseball, Blago's biggest crime before yesterday was the fact that he's a Cubs fan. No man that's in charge of the state where I live should root for the Cubs, because it's obvious from the onset that he can't be that intelligent. I don't want a loser running my state! I'm a winner! Illinois is a winner! We got corn, man! Corn! And soybeans!! We got plenty of hogs too, and they're all under the helm of some drooling Cubs fan.

Still, being a Cubs fan from Chicago is no reason to lose your life, or be named AOTW. I mean, I'm friends with plenty of Cubs fans, some of whom even write for this site. So if all the reasons above are horrible offenses, but not enough to be named Asshole Of The Week, why am I giving this "honor" to Blago?

Check this shit out, from the blog Urbanagora.

Urbanagora has learned from a credible source that Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich is a closet Dallas Cowboys fan. Even though he occasionally bets on the Bears, Blagojevich has been known to require interns, even those from Chicago, to clip news clippings about the Dallas Cowboys.

Our source reveals:

"When I interned for Blagojevich, in addition to clipping quotes about Chicago and Illinois politics, I was told to pull everything I could find about the Dallas Cowboys. On days I only found stories on current Chicago and Illinois events, I was told to look for Cowboys stories, but I was never asked for news about the Chicago Bears."

You son of a bitch. A Cowboys fan? A fucking Cowboys fan!? In my state!? Are you telling me that the walls of the Governor's mansion are covered in Tony Romo posters? If I voted, I'd kill somebody right now.

This isn't something that the great people of Illinois should tolerate from their governor, you either root for the Bears or move to fucking Iowa. There's no in between. It's bad enough that the southern part of our state is littered with moronic Rams fans, but to let the virus that is the Cowboys infect us as well?

I have to agree with the guys at Urbanagora, fuck this Rezko nonsense, this is the only reason we need for a recall election.

Governor Rod Blagojevich: You're an asshole.

Ocho Cinco in Chicago?

A few weeks ago there was a post I linked to in the High Five about the Bears trading Brian Urlacher to the Cincinnati Bengals for Chad Johnson. I made it pretty clear in the post that there was no way I'd like to see that trade go down.

What I didn't say was that there was no way I'd like to see the Bears trade for Chad Johnson.

Johnson has been asking for a trade for a while now, as he's not incredibly pleased with the way things are going in Cincinnati, and he'd like out of there as soon as possible. Then things got quiet for a while, but after Chad heard what his quarterback Carson Palmer said about the situation, he felt the need to reiterate his stance.

He still wants out.

What spurred Johnson's immediate reaction was a statement made by quarterback Carson Palmer that indicated Johnson had told Palmer he would be at the team's mandatory minicamp in mid-June. Johnson said that wasn't true.

"I want to make this very clear,'' Johnson said Wednesday. "I don't know where he got that. I made no assertion to Carson that I would do that. Nothing has changed from what I've been saying for three months that I don't want to play for the Bengals.''

Johnson made one of his strongest statements in saying he is not planning on reporting to any team functions because he wants to be traded.

"I want to be traded before the draft, and if that doesn't happen, I want to be traded as soon as possible,'' Johnson said. "I don't intend on reporting to anything.''

So I guess the question I'm trying to ask here is: Should the Bears trade for Chad Johnson?

I've been thinking about it ever since I first heard that Chad wanted out of Cincinnati, but I honestly can't come up with an answer. On the surface it's pretty simple.

The Bears need a wide receiver. Chad Johnson is a very good wide receiver. Over the last five seasons Chad has made 462 receptions for 6,870 yards and 43 touchdowns. I would try to compare that to a great Bears receiver of old, but there's never been one in the history of the franchise that's had that kind of 5-year span. Hell, there hasn't been a Chicago Bear to have one season like any of Chad's last five.

Still, you can't just look at the surface when it comes to Chad Johnson. You have to look beneath and see that he's the type of player that wants a lot of attention, and could become a very big locker room distraction. Is that the type of thing that the Bears are willing to deal with?

Not to mention that if Chad isn't happy in Cincinnati where he has Carson Palmer as his quarterback, how long before he revolted against Rex Grossman or Kyle Orton?

There's also the slight problem with the Bengals repeatedly saying they have absolutely no interest in trading him. This could just be nothing more than a negotiating ploy, but it could just as easily be the honest truth as well. Which means the Bears would have to pay a hefty price to get him away.

If this were a video game like Madden, there'd be absolutely no question what the Bears should do because you don't have to deal with all the off the field crap. Unfortunately we live in real life. I still don't know what to do.

What say you, Foul Balls reader?

Your 2008 Chicago Bears Schedule

Because it's never too early to start figuring out how many games we're going to lose this season.

1. @ Colts 7:15PM
2. @ Panthers Noon
3. vs. Buccaneers Noon
4. vs. Eagles 7:15
5. @ Lions Noon
6. @ Falcons Noon
7. vs. Vikings Noon
8. Bye
9. vs. Lions Noon
10. vs. Titans Noon
11. @ Packers Noon
12. @ Rams Noon
13. @ Vikings 7:15PM
14. vs. Jaguars Noon
15. vs. Saints 7:15PM (Thursday)
16. vs. Packers 7:30PM (Monday)
17. @ Texans Noon

Wow, five primetime games for this team? They went to the Super Bowl in 2006 and didn't get that many primetime games last season. Also, what's with all the three game "home stands" and "road trips?"

Obviously it's way too early to make any predictions, but looking at this schedule I think it's obvious the Bears are going 16-0 this season.

Tommie Harris Rejects Bears Offer

What the hell, Tommie!? Just yesterday you were saying how much you want a deal to get done, and then I even went and wrote an entire post for you saying you deserved it. My post was so convincing, that the Bears then turned right around and made you an offer. (That's the only logical explanation, right? Hi, Jerry Angelo!)

And you turned it down!

There were no fireworks when contract talks between Drew Rosenhaus and the Bears broke off Wednesday.

Just because they didn't reach a new deal for defensive tackle Tommie Harris doesn't mean it's not a possibility, as well as a priority for the Bears. It just might take some time. Extensions for players under contract are always a delicate issue.

The Bears are believed to have offered Harris more than the record-setting seven-year, $50.5 million contract Tommy Kelly received from the Oakland Raiders earlier this offseason. But how the money was structured in the offer is unknown, and Harris is justified in asking to be the highest-paid defensive tackle in the league. For now at least, he's expected to continue participating in the conditioning program that began Monday.

Okay, so it's not the end of the world or anything, because the odds Harris and the Bears will come to terms are still good, we just don't know when. Even though the details of the offer weren't released, I'm pretty sure it was bigger than Tommy Kelly's deal from the Raiders, and I'd be willing to bet that the guaranteed money is what caused Harris and Rosenhaus to reject the deal.

Of course, the Bears wouldn't be the Bears if they didn't try to squeeze every penny they can out of their players, so this isn't really a surprise. Like I said, this deal will still get done, and if it doesn't, they'll just franchise Tommie and go from there.

Tommie Harris Would Like a Contract Too, Please

While the Chicago Tribune's David Haugh seems to be on a one-man crusade to get Brian Urlacher a new contract (Seriously, David, have you been promised a percentage?), we shouldn't forget that there are other members of the roster deserving of one as well. Obviously, it probably wouldn't be a bad thing for Devin Hester to get a contract extension seeing as he's the only scoring threat on the team. Then there's defensive tackle Tommie Harris, who may be more important to the defense than Brian Urlacher seeing as how constant double teams on Harris help keep blockers off Urlacher.

Harris and his agents, the Rosenhaus brothers, have been in talks with the Bears recently, and Tommie is somewhat optimistic a deal can be reached.

Harris was to dine with agents Drew and Jason Rosenhaus on Tuesday evening, and if the group determines the Bears' offer is close, a deal might materialize quickly.

Otherwise, negotiations could go the way they did for linebacker Lance Briggs two years ago. Rosenhaus arrived to close a deal, and the sides got close before negotiations broke off. Briggs wound up skipping the voluntary offseason program in 2006 and begrudgingly played with the franchise tag last year.

''I want a fair deal,'' said Harris, a three-time Pro Bowl defensive tackle. ''I'm not asking for anything ridiculous. [The franchise tag] is not even a figment of my imagination. We're in 2008, and I really don't go that far. I'm optimistic.''

A big reason why Harris would like to get a deal done now is because at the age of 25, signing a four-year deal now would mean he'd get another contract before the age of 30. In the NFL, where money isn't guaranteed, it's important to get as much as you can when you can. Still, if I were Tommie I don't think I'd be ignoring the fact that the Bears may slap the franchise tag on me.

When you look at the contracts teams have given to defensive tackles lately, the Raiders for instance gave Tommy Kelly $50.5 million over 7 years, and he only played in 7 games last season. He's a good player, but he's no Tommie Harris. Then there are the deals Shaun Rogers just got from the Browns (6 years, $42 million), and the one Cory Redding got from the Lions before last season (7 years, $49 million).

That's a lot of money being given to defensive tackles who I don't consider to be as good as Harris.

So when you consider how much it will probably cost to sign Harris to a long-term deal, and then consider that Tommie has had his share of injuries in his first few years as a Chicago Bear, it might make more sense to franchise Harris and see what happens.

The team currently has about $16 million in cap space, but the Bears are also believed to be talking to Hester, Urlacher, and even Robbie Gould about extensions as well. If Tommie's demands aren't ridiculous, then by all means, give him the deal. If he's looking for something like $55-$60 million with $25 to $30 million of it guaranteed, I'd say slap the franchise tag on him and make sure he can get through an entire season healthy.

Then, if he does that, give him anything he wants.

Brian Urlacher Voluntarily Decides To Not Go To Voluntary Workouts

Football season is still about four months away, but teams around the league have already begun their voluntary off-season workout programs. Now, they're called voluntary, and teams can't punish their players for missing them, but for the most part you're expected to show up.

A few years ago Thomas Jones and Lance Briggs skipped the workouts, and Lovie Smith took away their starting jobs. Last season it was Briggs again who skipped the workouts as a protest to his being franchised by the team, and wanting a long-term contract. Well, this year Lance finally has his money, and he's showing up to the workouts. Still, there's another Bears linebacker who's not going to be able to make it.

Brian Urlacher.

Brian Urlacher told the Tribune on Sunday he plans to skip the first day of workouts, slated to begin Monday, and left open the strong possibility that he will bypass the Bears' entire voluntary off-season program, which includes organized team activities (OTAs).

The face of the Bears franchise informed the team of his intentions to remain in Arizona rather than attend the program at Halas Hall.

Brian did miss a few workouts last season, but it had nothing to do with his contract as much as it had to do with taking parenting classes and going to court. This year, it's the contract.

Though Brian has gone about it in a much quieter way than Lance Briggs did last season, he wants a contract extension and his agent has been in constant contact with the Bears the last few weeks. Urlacher, of course, signed an extension with the Bears back in 2002 that at the time was the biggest contract in team history: Nine years, $56.65 million.

The problem is that Brian's contract is outdated now in 2008. He'll only be making $3.95 million this season, and while that's a lot of money to you and me, in the world of NFL linebackers it's pretty average these days.

This could turn out to be quite problematic for the Bears though, because I'm not sure signing Brian to an extension now is the right thing to do. He did just have neck surgery in the off-season, and I'm not sure committing a bunch of money to a soon-to-be 30 year old linebacker coming off of neck surgery is the wisest financial decision. Whether he likes it or not, he's still under contract with the team until 2011. Frankly, Brian should have known how outdated this deal would have become when he signed it, and maybe signed a 5-year deal instead which would have allowed him to test the free agent market and really strike it rich.

In Brief: Stay Away, Brett

Yesterday the Los Angeles Times reported that Brett Favre's agent has been in contact with teams not named the Green Bay Packers to see if they'd be interested in the recently retired quarterback. Both Favre and his agent deny the story, but really, would you be shocked if Favre came out of retirement? A part of me is hoping he does because you know it would cause half the population of Green Bay to kill themselves, while the rest just rock in a chair muttering "Why, Brett? Why?" for the rest of their lives.

Just as long as he doesn't sign with the Bears. I'm not sure my brain would know how to cope with that.

Lovie Smith: 'Barack Is My President'

In Lovie Smith's first three seasons as head coach of the Chicago Bears, we haven't really learned to much about the man. We know so little about him, in fact, that I'm not sure he isn't a robot. Think about it, he never shows any real emotion on the sideline (save for the end of the NFC Championship game), and he never shows any emotion with the media.

Which is why I was shocked when I read in the Sun-Times that Lovie is publicly supporting Barack Obama in his campaign to be the next President.

''I'm not neutral; I'm a big Barack Obama fan,'' Smith said Wednesday during a media breakfast at the NFL owners meetings. ''I believe in his plan for our future.''

Smith isn't saying if he believes in Obama's plan for the Bears future.

''He has some advice on the quarterback situation,'' Smith said with a laugh. ''We've talked. Most people from Chicago support the Bears, and he's definitely one. He's a die-hard Bears fan, and he'll let you know it, which is great.''

I don't spend much time here talking about politics, and there's a reason for it: I don't care. I will tell you that right now if I was going to vote (I'm not) for any of the three options come November, I probably would be voting for Obama. Not for any political reason though, but because he's a White Sox fan. (Though ever since my friend Kaleem sent me a picture of John McCain's daughter, my support has wavered.)

That last sentence alone should probably make you all grateful that I don't vote.

Just as long as Hillary doesn't win, because if I wanted a woman telling me what to do, I'd just get married.

It's The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year

When I woke up this morning, I had a smile on my face. Today is the day I've been waiting for since early February when the Giants were shocking the world by beating the Patriots in the Super Bowl.

The dead time that is sports in February and March is over, and not even the crappy weather outside can bring me down. Do you realize what's taking place over the next five days?

Tonight, after three long days, the NCAA tournament picks back up in the Sweet 16, and over the next four nights we'll all learn who the Final Four is going to be. Then, on Monday we get a full day of baseball. And not that crappy kind of spring training baseball where #65 gets #82 to ground into an inning ending double play. The real kind. The kind played in Major League parks where the stats are official, and beers are $7.

As far as I'm concerned, this is the best time of the year.

Along with the tournament and baseball, I also take comfort in knowing that I'm only going to have to deal with the Bulls for a few more weeks. After being a good soldier and sitting through this Bulls season, I deserve a vacation from this team. I think we all do.

It's been a very tough year for Chicago sports fans like us. Ever since the Bears lost in the Super Bowl last February, the entire city has gone down the toilet.

Illinois got eliminated in the first round of last year's NCAA tournament, and then crapped the bed this season.

The White Sox followed up two consecutive 90 win seasons with their first losing season since the last century.

The Cubs won the division and made the playoffs, but were then quickly disposed of by the Diamondbacks, rounding out a century's worth of heartbreak.

The Bears followed up their Super Bowl run with one of the most disappointing seasons, for me anyway, by a team in this city that I can remember. We then had the added insult of seeing Eli Manning win a Super Bowl knowing that, until the playoffs started, he was just Rex Grossman East.

The Illini football team had a great season, the best of any of our local teams, but even that ended on a sour note as they were trampled by the Trojans in the Rose Bowl, and then Rashard Mendenhall left for the NFL.

The Blackhawks are actually having a winning season, and are gaining traction in this city once again, but even so, they aren't going to make the playoffs this year. At least there's hope, though.

Then there's the Bulls, who have somehow managed to be the most embarrassing team in the city this year, and they've had a lot of competition so you know they earned it.

But starting this morning, none of that matters.

Whether you're a White Sox fan or a Cubs fan, this is the weekend where you get to wash the dirty feeling of the last year off your skin. Start the cleansing with a weekend of college basketball, and then on Monday, call in sick to work and stay home to bathe in baseball.

You've earned it. We all have.

The Bears Are Very Protective of Their Property

I think most of us have been there. You're dating a girl, and you have been for a while. Things have gone pretty well for the most part, but lately, lately things have been a little rough. She is looking for more from you, and honestly, you're just not ready to make that type of commitment. You're still young! You've all sorts of adventures waiting to be had!

So you start fighting a lot more often, nothing major, but sometimes in public in front of all your friends. Then one night when you're out at your friend's party after a fight with her, you see she's on the other side of the room flirting with that asshole from accounting.

Now you're pissed.

You walk right over to that douchebag CPA and let him know he's not to mess with your girl. She's yours.

You know what I'm saying, right?

Well, that's exactly what the Bears did, except it wasn't their girlfriend exactly, it was Lance Briggs. And the CPA was the San Francisco 49ers, and instead of letting the Niners know how they felt, they ran to their mommy to take care of it for them. And mommy did just that.

The NFL found the 49ers guilty of tampering with the Bears linebacker last season and punished the NFC West team Monday by taking away its fifth-round selection in the April 26-27 draft. San Francisco violated the league's anti-tampering policy by contacting Briggs' agent, Drew Rosenhaus, last season without the Bears' permission.

Briggs was on a one-year tender as the team's franchise player. He declined to comment when reached by phone Monday. Rosenhaus did not return a message.

What's even better? Not only do the Niners have to give up their 5th round pick for lookin at out girl, but they have to swap their third round pick (7th of round) with ours (12th of round). So not only do we keep our girl, but we took their beer and copped a feel on his wife! We're total bad asses right now, and if our lady doesn't want to be with us anymore, there are 20 other girls at the party that wouldn't mind changing places with her.

The moral of the story here, kids, is always tattle. Everybody loves a tattler, and good things come to those who snitch.

Marty Booker Is Back With the Bears

In a move that should come as a surprise to no one, the Bears finally signed somebody that wasn't a member of the team last season, though he was a Chicago Bear back in 2004 before being traded to Miami during the preseason.

Marty Booker has signed a two-year deal to return to the Bears.

Booker, who turns 32 in July, is vacationing out of the country. He will get $3.5 million in the deal.

''I still have plenty of good years left,'' he said last month. ''I've been saved [in Miami] for four years.''

The Bears traded Booker and a third-round pick to the Dolphins at the end of the 2004 preseason for defensive end Adewale Ogunleye. The move crushed Booker, but he recovered enough to want to return.

Marty wanted to come back so badly that, since being released by the Dolphins three weeks ago, he didn't really look for a job anywhere else. He had a visit with the Patriots, but nothing concrete came out of it, as Booker kept waiting by the phone for the Bears to call.

Initially, the Bears' interest in Booker was lukewarm, but after losing both Bernard Berrian and Muhsin Muhammad the last few weeks, I guess they figured they better sign someone.

Marty had a couple of very good seasons with the Bears, he's the last Bear to record a 1,000 yard season, owns the team record for receptions in a season (100 in 2001). The last few seasons in Miami haven't been that great for Marty, but in his defense, he was playing in Miami.

I don't expect Booker to come back here and become a 1,000 yard receiver again, but he's clearly a better option than anyone the Bears already had. I'd still like to see the Bears sign another free agent receiver, like Bryant Johnson or D.J. Hackett, and maybe draft one as well in what's a deep class of receivers this season.

Are The Bears Going To Get Started Anytime Soon?

Free agency in the NFL started on Friday, and over the weekend there was a ton of player movement throughout the league.

Well, not here.

The Bears re-signed Lance Briggs, and at less money than they paid him last season, which is absolutely awesome.

I did not want to lose Lance Briggs, especially with Brian Urlacher's back problems. He's too big a part of the defense to just assume you can plug anybody else in there, and things will be fine.

Still, like a lot of teams, the Bears have a ton of cap space this offseason and I was hoping to see them use it somewhere else than just re-signing their own players. If you're going to let Bernard Berrian leave to sign a ridiculously over-priced contract with the Vikings, fine, but you better use that money somewhere else.

Like, say, on the offensive line where Alan Faneca would have looked really good. Instead, Faneca signed a deal with the Jets. Okay, well how about Cowboys left tackle, and my former high school teammate, Flozell Adams? Oh, he re-signed with the Cowboys.

Don't get me wrong, what bothers me is not that we didn't get them. Faneca never got to Chicago before the Jets blew him away with an offer, so I can't blame the Bears for that, and as far as I know Flozell never talked to anybody besides Dallas.

It's that I haven't heard that the Bears aren't talking about signing anybody who isn't already on the roster. For a team that finished 7-9 last season, and has a ton of needs at different positions, is sitting still during free agency really the smartest thing to do?

I know that Jerry Angelo doesn't want to fall in the trap that a lot of teams are right now, mistaking tons of cap room now for cap room in the future (seriously, let's see how the Vikings feel about that Berrian contract in a few years), but at the same time there's something to be said about taking a shot at winning now.

This Bears team as currently constructed is nowhere near good enough to get back to, much less win, a Super Bowl. Not even in the NFC. Within the Bears' own division the Vikings have already gotten better, and there are rumors Randy Moss is considering going to Green Bay to play with Brett Favre.

Of course, there are also rumors that Randy Moss and Daunte Culpepper are going to reunite in Minnesota. So who knows what we can actually believe.

While a lot of the big name (and I use that term loosely this offseason) free agents have already signed, there are still a lot of quality players available who can help this Bears team. Javon Walker would be a nice addition to the offense, but there are a lot of teams interested in him, so he'll probably cost way too much.

But while teams focus on trying to get Javon, why don't the Bears contact Bryant Johnson or D.J. Hackett? Sure, neither are Pro Bowl type of players, but they're both better options than what the team currently has, and no matter which mediocre quarterback wins the job, he'll need somebody to throw the ball to.

Just do something. If for no other reason than to make me think you're trying to win next season.

Bernard Berrian Is Now A Viking

And now, somehow, someway, the Bears offense has managed to get even worse.

Jerry Angelo better be on the phone with Javon Walker's agent.