Penn State's Nittany Lion Is The Latest Mascot to Wreak Havoc On Society

Is it just me or are mascots quickly becoming the most dangerous people in the United States? It's as though donning the big foam head turns a person from a solid citizen into a rebel hell bent on destroying the foundations of society. These days when mascots aren't standing on the sidelines getting the home fans into the game, they can be found behind the wheel of that car swerving back in forth in front of you.

The latest mascot to get in trouble with the law is Penn State's Nittany Lion. Apparently being an animal that doesn't really exist has wreaked havoc on his psyche, so as a result he decided to change the school's motto from "We Are...Penn State" to "I Am...Fucking Wasted."

The student who is the Penn State Nittany Lion mascot was charged with driving drunk on campus the morning of the Michigan State football game.

Penn State police say James D. Sheep, of Chambersburg, was pulled over at 3:16 a.m. Nov. 22 near Shortlidge and Curtin roads after an officer saw too many people were in his car, causing the rear suspension to drag low to the ground.

Sheep, who also has a residence at 818 Bellaire Ave. in State College, was later found to have a blood-alcohol content of .164.

Am I the only one who sees the irony of a man named Sheep dressing up as a Lion?

Anyway, while Sheep's .164 BAC is pretty impressive, it's not a mascot record. Hell, it's not even a mascot record in Western Pennsylvania. You may remember that the man who brought the Pittsburgh Steelers' Steely McBeam to life got busted with a BAC of .166, which shows us all the difference between being a professional mascot and a college mascot.

Of course Steely McBeam lost his job. As of now the school hasn't made any announcement about Sheep's future with the school, but something tells me he won't be making the trip with the team to Pasadena for the Rose Bowl.