Dusty Baker Is Already Terrifying Reds Fans

One of the stories I plan on keeping my eye on this baseball season is the return of Cubs former manager/toothpick mangler Dusty Baker to the dugout after having to listen to him on ESPN last season. There aren't many things that White Sox and Cubs fans can agree on when it comes to baseball, but one of them is that Dusty Baker is just not that good of a manager.

What it took Cubs fans a few years to figure out, that he's too loyal to a lot of mediocre players, disdains playing youngsters, and destroys pitching arms, Reds fans are already figuring out in their first spring with Dusty.

With the Reds signing former Cubs Corey Patterson and Jerry Hairston Jr. on Tuesday, some Reds fans can already see the writing on the wall.

We should have seen this coming long ago. Baker managed Corey Patterson when both were in Chicago. There’s nothing he loves more than playing veterans, except maybe familiarity and players who don’t clog the bases. Patterson is a veteran. He’s an ex-Baker-ite. Oh, and he’scoming off a season where he posted a .304 OBP.

He’s fucking perfect for Dusty. He’s fast, but he won’t give you all those pesky chances to score runs! Why the hell would you want a guy who had 80 extra-base hits in the minors last season when you could just have a replacement level player get 600 plate appearances in a completely winnable division.

OK, so most of this rage is really just despair. I was really looking forward to watching the Reds this year, and this is the first sign that Dusty Baker is going to wreck it all. Between Adam Dunn, Ken Griffey Jr., Bronson Arroyo and the exciting crop of youngsters headed by Jay Bruce, Joey Votto, Homer Bailey and Johnny Cueto, Cincinnati was looking like one of the most exciting fringe contenders this side of Tampa Bay.

Corey Patterson is only the beginning. He’s already making up for fake reasons for Jay Bruce to sit on the bench. Now I’m expecting Scott Hatteberg to start Opening Day, Adam Dunn to be hitting seventh by May and Homer Bailey’s shoulder to be in Mark Prior-esque shape by Labor Day.

The season hasn't even started yet, and Reds fans are already trying to run Dusty out of town.

It's going to be a fun season to watch in Cincinnati.