Bob Costas Wants Me to Get a Life
Am I a bad person because I keep a sports blog?
I know I'm a bad writer (hey, you get what you pay for, folks) and a bad ass, but I'm really scared I'm a horrible person for keeping this blog. After all, that's what people like Michael Wilbon, Jay Mariotti, and other writers and media folk keep telling me.
I wasn't too worried about it before, because I figure, as newspaper columnists, these guys are all just reacting to the shrinking newsrooms that surround them and the shrinking papers their companies keep putting out (seriously, the Sun-Times has become a fucking pamphlet), and look at bloggers and the internet as the reasons for their demise.
Then Bob Costas had to go and say this, and I'm not sure what to think anymore.
"...it's one thing if somebody just sets up a blog from their mother's basement in Albuquerque and they are who they are, and they're a pathetic get-a-life loser, but now that pathetic get-a-life loser can piggyback onto someone who actually has some level of professional accountability and they can be comment No. 17 on Dan Le Batard's column or Bernie Miklasz' column in St. Louis. That, in most cases, grants a forum to somebody who has no particular insight or responsibility. Most of it is a combination of ignorance or invective.Bob then jumped down off of his booster seat and piggybacked a ride to the bathroom. It's on the second floor, and that's a lot of work for those little legs.
"It's just a high-tech place for idiots to do what they used to do on bar stools or in school yards, if they were school yard bullies, or on men's room walls in gas stations. That doesn't mean that anyone with half a brain should respect it.''
I don't get it. I'm a loser because I have an opinion on sports and I share it with the world? Just what the fuck do you do, Costas? I'm pretty sure it's the same fucking thing. What the hell did you do in your life before getting your first gig any differently than me that qualifies you as somebody whose opinion should actually count?
Just because you're pissed off that Inside the NFL got cancelled, don't go taking it out on me.
Besides, I'm more qualified to do this than you are, and I can prove it. Let's go to the tale of the tape!
Height
- Fornelli - 6'2
- Costas - 4'7
Weight
- Fornelli - 230 pounds of twisted steel and sex appeal
- Costas - 105 pounds of smugness (I can make up words if I want to, it's my blog) and estrogen
Hometown
- Fornelli - Chicago
- Costas - The Land of Oz
Education
- Fornelli - The streets, son!
- Costas - Syracuse
Ethnicity
- Fornelli - Italian/Scottish - Not only are we responsible for the movies Gladiator and Braveheart, but there was that whole Renaissance thing, ruling the world for a while, and of course, pizza.
- Costas - Greek - Enjoy having sex with underage boys. (Mostly so Bob can look his lover in the eyes.)
Childhood Hero
- Fornelli - Michael Jordan
- Costas - Mickey Mantle
Penis Size
- Fornelli - Unknown, ran out of tape measure
- Costas - 3.4 inches when fully erect
Movie Character Most Closely Resembled
- Fornelli - Michael Corleone from The Godfather
- Costas - Rudy from Rudy
The numbers don't lie, Costas! That's 7-1 me, asshole.
Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to go upstairs and tell my mom to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. It's time to celebrate.
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5 comments:
OK, but that BASEketball cameo's gotta count for something.
I presume I should not write here or anywhere in that matter. My education doesn't support this realm of possibility. Though, I do have more education than the subjects he was referencing... Sorry dude!!!
Classic.
Haha,
You've outdone yourself this time. I don't get how these guys can talk down about people doing exactly what they do. Sports writers are getting mad because people have finally realized that they are just asshats writing their opinions and have no real skill other than entertaining journalism.
I'm sorry, but Journalism isn't some mythical skill you learn. People either have it or they don't. Just because these guys get paid a bunch of money by the last vestiges of the newspaper world doesn't make them any better than you or I. In fact, I think it might make them worse because they get incredibly lazy and write for the money rather than the enjoyment of writing.
Long Live Blogging!
Back in 1996,during the opening ceremony of Atlanta Olympics, this scoundrel kept talking about South Africa's apartheid regime, Australia's persecution of aborigines and what not, does not talk about American past at all!
When other nations won gold medals, they would suddenly shift their attention to other events where they focussed again on Americans. I barely saw flags and national anthems of other countries during the entire event.
I called and left voicemails for NBC and Bob Costas, of course to no avail. I don't know why he's been hanging around for so long.
Come on, Olympics is NOT a venue to display patriotism. There are so many heros from so many parts of the world and it's so heart warming to see them compete in the spirit of one world, and these chest thumping Bob Costas of the world have to give us lessons in patriotism
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