Thank God Almighty, We Are Free At Last!

He's gone!

Thank you, Jesus, he is gone!!

Let January 29th, 2008 go down as one of the greatest days in Chicago White Sox history. I feel like a Russian on the day Stalin died. Not even the 30 MPH winds, and -20 wind chill in Chicago could cool the warm feelings flooding my heart on Tuesday night.

Johan Santana is gone. Not only out of the AL Central, but out of the American League.

That's right, Cubs fans, he's your problem now.

...on Tuesday afternoon, the New York Mets agreed to a tentative deal with the Minnesota Twins for arguably the best pitcher on the planet, Johan Santana, for a package of four prospects.

Santana has a full no-trade clause and can veto the deal unless he gets a contract extension, and it's expected that the Mets and Santana will begin negotiating as soon as possible. New York and Santana have until 5 p.m. ET Friday to reach an agreement, a baseball official told The Associated Press, on condition of anonymity. Deadlines have been extended in the past, however.

If Santana agrees to a deal -- and it is thought he will seek a six-year, $150 million contract -- then he also would have to pass a physical.

Blah, blah, blah, who the hell cares? He's gone!

The Mets already knew that Santana is going to want $150 million, so I see no reason why they're going to have a problem giving it to him, and I have no doubt he's going to pass his physical.

No longer will I have to suffer watching Johan pick apart my beloved White Sox five or six times a season, and when you consider the fact the Twins also lost Torii Hunter and Carlos Silva this offseason, we might actually be able to beat them consistently.

Third place is ours, bitches!

Of course, this is a sad day for Twins fans, as it's never easy to lose a pitcher of Johan's caliber. For those poor souls who are reading this, I offer you these soothing words of the great Nelson Munce.

Foul Balls

Alonzo Spellman: Still Crazy After All These Years - Do you remember Alonzo Spellman? He's one of my favorite Chicago Bears of all time. Not for what he did on the football field, but for all the crazy shit he did off of it.

There was the time in 1998 when he barricaded himself in his publicist's house after a doctor was late for an appointment, and threatened suicide. It took Mike Singletary to convince him to go to a hospital and get himself checked out, where it was discovered Alonzo had bi-polar disorder.

Everything was fine for a while, since Alonzo was taking his medications, and he was able to play a few more years with the Cowboys and Lions. Then he retired, and figured he didn't need his medication anymore.

His assumption was wrong.

On July 23rd, 2002 Spellman was on a flight from Cincinnati to Philadelphia when he lost it. He started screaming that the plane was going to crash, and then started yelling at other passengers and even threatened to kill members of the flight crew. The plane had to make an emergency landing, and afterwards Alonzo was sentenced to 18 months in a federal prison for what he'd done.

Then Alonzo was quiet for awhile, until now, that is.

Former Bears defensive lineman Alonzo Spellman was arrested Tuesday after Tulsa police fired pepper-spray pellets into his car following a 20-minute chase.

Spellman was booked into the Tulsa County Jail on complaints of eluding, assault with a deadly weapon on a police officer, resisting arrest and driving without a license, jail records show. His bond was set at $10,700 and Spellman remained jailed Tuesday evening.

The chase began at 12:23 p.m. after officers responded to a disturbance at a convenience store in midtown Tulsa, police spokesman Leland Ashley said. When officers arrived, Spellman got into a green Chrysler Pacifica and drove away, Ashley said.

"He took us on a little pursuit," Ashley said. "We had to use stop sticks that took out three of his tires."

After the vehicle stopped, the 36-year-old Spellman refused to get out of the car for about 20 minutes until officers fired "pepper bullets" through the windows.

Oh, Alonzo. How I've missed you.

How's Rocket Going To Get Out Of This One? - While I've never been a fan of Roger Clemens, I have to admit, I've admired his fervor in defending himself ever since he was named in the Mitchell Report.

First there was the denial, then there was the taped conversation with Brian McNamee, followed by the 60 Minutes interview, and finally we had the "War and Peace"-esque statistical report Clemens released to prove steroids had nothing to do with his success late in his career.

It's going to be interesting to see how Rocket tries to get out of this one, as his friend, and fellow Mitchell Reporter, Andy Pettite is willing to testify that he and Clemens talked about HGH on a number of occasions.

"Based on what we know, there was a situation where Andy was speaking to Roger in Brian's presence, then Andy came over to Brian and essentially said, 'Why didn't you tell me about this stuff?' He referred to HGH," [Brian McNamee's lawyer Earl] Ward said. "Brian discouraged him and then several months later, when he [Pettitte] got injured, he came back and asked Brian about it, and that's when Brian injected him. We believe that based on the fact that Andy came to Brian and asked him about HGH, it was Roger who told Andy about HGH and that's why he asked Brian about it."

Richard Emery, another lawyer for McNamee, said his client and Pettitte also discussed steroids use by Clemens.

"Pettitte is certainly going to tell the truth and if he tells the truth everything will be fine," Emery said.

"There are a number of conversations where Pettitte and Brian talked about Clemens' use. I think there is everything to believe Pettitte is not a liar."

If I'm Andy Pettite, I'd be expecting a phone call this morning.

The Single Greatest Moment Of My Life - You know, during the few years that I've been blogging at Foul Balls, and now at FanHouse, I've had a few highs in my career.

There was the time my post on Ron Santo was featured in the Chicago Sun-Times.

There was the time Foul Balls was mentioned in the New York Times.

There was the time when I was mentioned by name on ESPN.com

None of those moments can even hold a candle to this one.

As someone who's loved The Dugout so much, for so very long, this is the greatest honor of my lifetime.

Well, until Leitch lets me write the White Sox preview on Deadspin in March. But still, it's pretty fucking awesome.

Long Live The Republic of New Fornellia!