High Five

A quick look around the interweb while hiding in Mariotti's bushes

1. What's the point of Thursday if you don't read the Jamboroo? [Deadspin]
2. T.O. is sorry about his comments about Jessica Simpson, and he'd like her phone number. [Dallas Morning News]
3. Arizona State cheerleaders are big fans of Santa Claus and anal penetration. [With Leather]
4. Crisis in Green Bay!! [The Postmen]
5. Stuart Scott has cancer, but he'll be back on television annoying you come Friday. [FanHouse]