Lance Briggs Cannot Drive

It's a good thing Lance Briggs signed that contract and showed up to camp on time this season. If he hadn't, it'd be a lot harder to replace the $350,000 Lamborghini he destroyed this morning. (Link includes video)

Illinois State Police today were investigating an overnight crash on the Edens Expressway of a Lamborghini luxury sports car belonging to Chicago Bears linebacker Lance Briggs.

The heavily damaged 2007 Lamborghini Roadster was found around 3:14 a.m. off the northbound lanes of Interstate Highway 94 near Devon Avenue, Illinois State Police Sgt. Theodore Whittier said. No one was found inside the car and there was no indication that anyone was injured in the crash, Whittier said.

One tiny problem for Lance, he left the scene of the accident. Briggs called the police to let them know about it, and then took off.

What that means, well, I'm not sure. Is it possible that Lance had been drinking and didn't want to be around when the cops showed up? Yes. Especially considering he walked away from that crash unscathed. Sober people never walk away from those things without some injuries.

Am I saying he was definitely drunk? No! Never!! Sober people drive their Lamborghini's in the oncoming traffic lane at 3 AM all the time!